Mistakes Men Make, Mom's Advice You Shouldn't Take from Rush2go

Mistakes Men Make, Mom's Advice You Shouldn't Take

Yes, it's that time once again: the day we feature your dating and relationship questions. Although we would like to answer each one personally, and with as much detail as possible, the overwhelming amount of inquiries forces us to highlight those that are most interesting to our readers; your e-mail may even be answered in the process.

This week's Q&A focuses on what holds men back from being successful with women, and why our mothers want us to be nice guys when we pick up. What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful With Women , has your answers.

In your opinion, what is the single biggest thing that holds guys back from achieving success with women?

Let me put it this way...

I've read that about 95% of the population in America is either dead or dead broke by the age of 65. This means that only one in about 20 people are financially independent by the time they reach retirement age.

When I read that, I thought to myself: You know, I'll bet that all the people who reach age 65 and are broke thought that they'd make it big, and that they didn't need to worry about saving money during their lives.

I know so many people that just don't pay attention to the important things, and they wind up getting into all kinds of trouble as a result.

What does this have to do with your question?

I think that most guys who aren't successful with women are thinking one of two things:

1- I'll never be successful, so I might as well just accept it, and learn to deal with it.

2- I need to make a lot of money, buy a nice car, take women out for fancy dinners, and offer them a great lifestyle in order to make them like me.

Of course, these are mental lies that actually hurt us.

These are the kinds of thoughts that keep us from doing something about our situations, and that make us wind up either alone or in horrible relationships .

In either case, the feeling of desperation just sucks, and it doesn't have to be this way!

So what's the answer?

Well, I think the answer is to put yourself out there, and learn how to attract women.

Instead of leaving it to chance and winding up like the majority of men who have horrible success with women, you have to get up off your ass and make it happen.

Why do you think our moms always tell us to be nice to women, take them out to dinner, buy them flowers, etc.? Is there any merit to this?

As you can imagine, I have a few thoughts on the "moms teaching us to be 'nice' to women and buy them flowers," and why they teach us this stuff.

I've thought a lot about this one, and I've even had many discussions with my own mom about it.

Of course, my mom thinks that all men should take women out for dinner, buy them things, get them gifts, and support them financially. As you can imagine, the conversations that she and I have are interesting.

But think about it. Your mom isn't going to say: "Well, son, we women don't have any idea why we feel attraction for men, but the ones we do feel attraction for are usually difficult, funny, mysterious, and challenging."

Moms are trying to teach their sons to be politically correct nice guys, and imagining an ideal young woman who will see that wonderful, sweet, kind boy of theirs -- who they taught to act like a girly-man -- and think he's just perfect.

They're trying to create the nice guy that they wish that they were attracted to.

Read that again.

They can't admit that they want the challenging, cocky, masculine guy that they read about in romance novels.

So they need something a little more "acceptable" to turn their boy into.

The reality is that women aren't going to teach you how to become a man that women feel an instant gut level attraction for.

Because they can't . They don't understand it themselves. And besides, women aren't interested in the guys they have to teach.

They want guys who trigger those feelings of attraction, not guys who need to learn how.